Getting set-up for CFS  by  "Shotgun Kaos"

  First and foremost you need a well stocked fridge with a good interior light, a bar fridge in the computer room preferably. But if you don’t have one dedicate an entire shelf of the kitchen fridge to the beer. Dispose of some food where the wife won't see it if you have too (I've found the family dog comes in handy for this purpose). This saves you having to restock the fridge in mid battle. Always be prepared for prolonged dog fighting!   Sit in your cockpit chair and reach your left arm outstretched toward and off to the left of the monitor and place your hand flat onto the table beside the monitor, draw a circle on this spot, this is where you will keep your battle beer, within easy reach of your left hand during battle, now do the same with your right hand only this time to the right of your monitor, this is where you will keep your spare beer, if this spot is empty during battle it is to be refilled next pee break. I have also found that it is a good idea to keep the empty beer carton beside your flight deck to dispose of the empty bottles or as I like to call them the dead soldiers.

  Setting up your flight deck is very important, you need everything within reach as the action can be fast paced so you cant afford your gaze to leave the screen for lengthy periods. My flight deck has a rolling shelf below the monitor table that the keypad usually sits on. Move the keyboard up to the table in front of the monitor and cover with a good sturdy plastic sandwich wrap, spilt beer can cause the keyboard to malfunction costing unnecessary expense and you need access to it when you are reminded to drop your gear for a landing (thank you Dusty).

  I like to keep the left hand side of the rolling shelf clear for the ashtray, its also handy to sit it on a fire resistant cloth. Sometimes that burning smell in a drunken stupor isn’t a touch of realism for the smell of your plane on fire, you have probably missed the ashtray all together and the ciggy is smoldering on the timber rolling shelf, I'm not sure how many times a rolling shelf can be sand papered back and repainted so make sure the computer desk you bought has replaceable shelves available, sometimes explaining burn marks to the little lady isn’t easy so what ever paint you used to paint your flight deck make sure you have plenty for touch ups. Wherever you can, encourage your sister to marry a painter or paint supplier (even better if she marries a hotel owner).

  The right hand side of the rolling shelf is where you keep your supply of cigarettes and a fully gassed lighter, always make sure you have enough ciggy’s for around a 6 hour battle, thus ensuring you will either pass out in a drunken stupor or the wife has chased you off to bed before you run out. (nothing worse then having to walk down the shop in a drunken stupor to get more) yesssssssss you have been drinking don’t attempt to drive. Place your flight stick of choice between the ashtray and your supply of cigarettes and make sure the path you take from your flight deck too the toilet is clear of any clutter you could trip over.

  You are now ready to slip your headset on, open Roger Wilco and log onto the MSN Gaming Zone. Choose the "Outlaws Hideout" game and ready your favorite plane before Vader starts counting down from 5, this means he's about to boot your ass for being to slow, if he boots you, you might not get to see Jdawg type Boom! Open the beer to your left and take a large gulp returning it to the circled spot. Once game starts avoid a player called Atox_Knight  he will Kamikaze you first opportunity he gets, you will now have been shot down by Falconeye, Dusty, Vader and Oinkjackson at least once each and have taken bullets from most of the Outlaws in the room, at this stage your probably thinking (I suck at this game) and who the hell is this CravenMorehead guy that keeps shooting at me. Don’t worry if you’re an easy target you will be invited back again and trust me when I say, the more we drink the worse our aim gets and the more you drink the better you will feel about being shot to pieces by the Outlaws.